As of late, I have been shooting with my iPhone and a favorite app, Hipstamatic. Everything about this app is imperfect and it falls right in line with my desire to live a more authentic life. I don’t edit the pictures, so you see pimples, sleepy eyes and various emotions right there in my eyes. I keep it real, people! This is who I am and I am not ashamed.

Now, back to that question, “Am I worth documenting?” In a nutshell, yes. I matter. I matter to my kids and my family, to friends and co-workers. I matter to myself and it still blows my mind that little ‘ole me matters to God. Documenting myself in pictures reminds me to pause and embrace my life exactly where it is. I am creating a legacy. My children are shutterbugs and enjoy photographing themselves. I love that, because I want them to see that they are perfect just as they are. We are all worth something, we matter and documenting our lives, be it with pictures or words is never a waste of time.

If you would like to start shooting portraits of yourself, consider joining my Self Portrait Experience Flickr group. There are so many talented creatives there and the ideas for self-portraits is endless. Enjoy!

Here is another vintage camera I received for Christmas. This one is in excellent condition. I have wanted one of these for a while.  I am on the hunt old film camera and lenses. This is one collection I am enjoying growing. Photography thrills me to pieces.

One of my ways of working things out is in my journal with words, pictures and doodles.

I thought it might be fun to reflect on events I experienced in the past decade, 2000-2009. I no longer have my usual resources to jog my memory, so I relied heavily on instant memories of what I could remember quickly in five minutes. My very short list below in no way captures the richness of the past ten years in my life. These are just a few of the things that stood out.

2000: Shawn and I married and honeymooned in NYC.

2001: My second daughter was born.

2002: Shawn and I visited the Bahamas.

2003: My son was born.

2004: Purchased our home. Started my first blog. Had Lasik eye surgery. Purchased my film camera.

2005: Purchased my DSLR.

2006: Started Candid Art Photography. Designed logos on the side.

2007: Won first photography contest. Started the Art Slam.

2008: Speaker at BlogHer 08, San Francisco

2009: Wow…lots of things happened this year.

Compassion literally means to feel with, to suffer with. Everyone is capable of compassion, and yet everyone tends to avoid it because it’s uncomfortable. And the avoidance produces psychic numbing — resistance to experiencing our pain for the world and other beings. ~ Joanna Macy

Something about this quote speaks to me. It is the part about being uncomfortable. Lately I have noticed that people do not like being out of their comfort zones. Doing so means they no longer have their usual safety net or standby routine. It is when you come out of your comfort zone that true growth begins. I have been living outside of mine for a few months now and describing it as uncomfortable does not seem to do it justice. Sometimes, it is downright painful. I feel exposed and vulnerable because I am putting everything on the line. There is no physical shield for me to hide behind, nor do I want to hide. This exposure, this openness, while extremely raw and uncomfortable is where I am growing. It is like being in a valley and while the valley is dark and often times lonely, there is a lesson there. For one, I realize I am not alone. For two, I have learned to truly give my burdens over and not carry the weight of them around. For three, being uncomfortable has taught me to have more compassion.

This week, one of the things I am working on is loving the sinner and not the sin when I interact with people. None of us is perfect. No, not one. This message was driven home in the sermon I listened to at my church Sunday. As was the message that our sins have already been paid for and we are washed clean as snow; all because of Jesus. Now, those of you who frequent my blog know I do not hide my love of the Lord. I have no intentions of starting now. My tribulations this year have proven one thing. That I can not be defeated when I stand strong in my faith. I am reminded of the flexibility of a palm tree. In a storm, the palm tree takes a beating. It bends from side to side, touching the ground as the storm rages around it, but in the end, it does not break. Strength without flexibility is stubbornness. There is no power in being unmovable in thought or feeling for the sake of being right. For some people, it is more important to be right and to judge. That kind of thinking and stubbornness profits no one. So, I pray everyday to be a more compassionate person. To treat people as I desire to be treated. Because this world can use a little more compassion. In fact, it could use a lot more.

The way holidays should be celebrated…with family.

She is the last thing to go on the tree. I have had this angel since before I was married. Many of the ornaments on our tree are years old, all with some kind of sentimental value or story. I love building these traditions with my children. These are the things that mean so much.

I have been reflecting on the reason for the season a lot this week. It started off Sunday when I was having my devotional time early in the morning. I was reading about the gift of Jesus. Then I went to church and heard again about the gift of Jesus and the sacrifice. Tuesday, I went to see Awaited and again…songs about the gift that is known as Jesus. Resonating on the power of this message has been profound for me this week and I understood it on a level I had not experienced before.